Saturday, September 29, 2012

From the Tap?!?

We all have memories from the past that we always bring up either because they remind us of the good times, sometimes for those bad times like for a close friend or family member who died. Maybe it was that night you got so drunk it was like The Hangover the next day figuring out everything you did and now it’s why you don’t drink.

I had one of these memories recently, particularly with my wife. It’s one of those events that we bring up every now and then to each other and each time it brings a laugh for both of us. It will be one of those stories we’ll be telling our kids and grand kids someday.

The story goes back to the first day we met in person. I clarify in person because we met through an online dating site. We talked for a couple months before we finally met at her dorm room.

Her dorm room was one of four in a small apartment setup. So she had three roommates. During our first meeting, I met two of them. It doesn't mean much for how many I met, but that I met one in particular. It’s because of her that we have our laugh.

Her roommate was from a city, and not used to a country setting or people from the country. So as we are sitting and talking her roommate from the city comes in from her class. Where upon meeting, she asks me some questions, including where I live, I say where it is and that it’s in the country.

Hearing I live in the country, the first follow up question was if I lived on a farm. I don’t mind the ignorance that her first instinct is that you live in the country you’re automatically a farmer. I can over look that since her first instinct wasn't that because I live in the country I’m automatically an inbred redneck hick with a deformed family member who plays the banjo.

I do inform her that I do live near some farms, but I don’t live or work on them. Her next question was if I ever see cows on the farms; a logical question. Her IQ must have risen 1 point with that question; my thought is maybe she’s not completely stupid. So I answer honestly that yes, I have seen cows before.

Now the follow up question is what my wife and I laugh about and recall just for the shear ridiculousness of the next question she asked, and remember she was completely serious when she asked the question. Do I have enough build up yet? The follow up question was:

Have you ever drank milk from the tap?

This is the face my wife and I made when we heard that. I think my IQ dropped when I heard that question. All I could do was stammer out the question, you mean drinking right from the utters? She responds, yeah, like right from the cow. I honestly can’t remember the next couple minutes following that because of the shear magnitude of my brain regaining any type of function. All I know is that we managed to set her straight that she meant unpasteurized milk and it would be drunk after being extracted from the cow into a bucket or container. There’s less than a 1% chance that there is someone getting under a cow and directly sucking on a teat for milk.

So my wife and I joke around with “drinking from the tap” every now and then. And I hope it becomes a weird lesson of there is such a thing as stupid questions.

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